I still don't believe you can adapt Watchmen in under four hours, but damned if what they've done so far doesn't look gorgeous.

In case anyone cares, I'm reccing again at calufrax this week. And now I have to go find a seventh story, because somehow I thought I had all seven picked out, and my rec file only had six when I checked it this morning. Whoops.

The bees love the echinacea. I love the bees on the echinacea.



( Five more photos after the cut, not all of which involve bees. )

Only three more stories since the last update; work has been so exhausting lately that I just don't have much brain left at the end of the day to write porn (or anything else). Here's what you get this time around: Nine/Jabe, Four/Romana II at several Parisian landmarks, and Ten/Donna on the Planet of the Hats.

As always, you can follow the links from the kinkmeme master post, or read the stories at Teaspoon once they're approved.

A couple of people asked for my list of post-"Journey's End" fics that didn't suck, and I have nothing better to do this evening than compile a rec list (okay, I could go write porn ...), so here you go. It's not a comprehensive list – there may be good ones out there I've missed or forgotten, and there's at least one (calapine's new story) that I'm going to try to hold off on reading until it's complete, because I hate reading WIPs – so if I've missed something you particularly enjoyed, feel free to tell me about it.

( Six fic recs, behind the cut. )

It's the cats' office. I just work there sometimes.

I've updated the kinkmeme master post with four new stories: Luke Rattigan/Miss Evangelista; Nine/Martha, in between LOTTL and "Reset"; Ten/Rose, in which Ten is built like a Ken doll; and one I suspect iko will enjoy, Master/Lucy breathplay. Yeah, I can't believe I wrote that last one either, but the kinkmeme is pretty much one long exercise in seeing just how low I can possibly sink.

These stories are also in the queue at Teaspoon, so you'll be able to read them there later if you prefer.

I slept like crap again last night -- WTF is up with stress-related insomnia on a weekend? -- and was barely functional most of today. But now I have made pizza from scratch (okay, the crust was from Bertucci's, because even my best efforts aren't as good as theirs); I watched a few more episodes of Secret Diary of a Call Girl thanks to the miracle of the intertubes; I have watched the cracktacular genius that was "The Stolen Earth" (memo to Rusty: PLZ TO NOT SCREW IT UP NEXT WEEK THX); and soon there will be strawberry shortcake with CSA strawberries and whipped cream that I just whipped by hand, thank you very much.

Now if I could just get some damned sleep, life would be perfect.

Almost all my kinkmeme fic is now available on Teaspoon, so I've unlocked my master list entry and a couple other related entries. Both the master list and the Teaspoon archive will usually be a little behind what I've actually posted, because I like keeping the stories anonymous for at least some small amount of time. If you get bored enough, you can go to the kinkmeme and try guessing which story I posted last night.

Since I'm about to be incredibly busy at work, drastically reducing the amount of time I have to write porn, I've written four more kinkmeme fics in as many days and have updated the master list accordingly. This round: DW/BSG angst-fest crossover, Harry Potter role-playing, Four/Donna at an orgy, and OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY ABOUT THIS DOCTOR/MASTER SPIKY COCKS.

The good news: columbina and I are working our way through the B series of QI, and of course, it is so funny we are in tears sitting here on the couch, laughing our heads off.

The bad news: I just heard Jeremy Clarkson utter the words "I went into a brothel on Saturday ... ."

MUST GO SCRUB OUT MY BRAIN NOW.

I've filled a bag of weeds, temporarily beaten the ground ivy and bindweed into submission, and laid down three bags of bark nugget mulch, which is in chunks too large for the ground ivy to gain a foothold. TOO BAD FOR IT. Tomorrow: build a trellis for the cucumbers and plant a few more peas.

BUT! That is not the important thing about the garden today. The important thing is that the garden has produced the first wee tomatoes of the season: Juliets, aka miniature plum tomatoes. They are about as big as my pinky nail right now. I also spotted a baby Jet Star.

Fresh, homegrown tomatoes. There is truly nothing better about summer.

Forgot to add one last night: Jackie Tyler & Jack Harkness make a sex tape. Ten watches a copy. It's on the list now.

Trivia: The Mac folder I use to store all my fic is called "Seriously, You Should Know Better." Funny how appropriate a name that's turned out to be.

I keep meaning to post the updated list of my kinkmeme fics, and I suppose there's no time like the present. I've deleted the old post so that I can keep this as a master list. Assuming I write more ficlets, and let's face it, I probably will, I'll post all updates here.

(Also available at Teaspoon.)

( Here be porn. )

To alleviate today's grumpiness, I took some flower photos I've been meaning to shoot for at least a week now. Most of them aren't anything special -- just documentation so that I know what blooms when -- but I must say that I am very pleased with this macro of one of the paper daisies in the front planter. My only regret is that I wish I'd framed it just a tiny bit better so that none of the top petals were cut off. Still, it'll do.



(As always, more garden shots in my photostream, if you care to look.)

Title: The Real Thing
Characters/Pairing(s): Ten/Donna/Jack
Rating: Adult
Word count: 2,500
Spoilers: None
Summary: Ten, Donna, Jack, and a bed.
Beta: platypus
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.
Author's Notes: As threatened, this is the PWP followup to my story "The Replacement." It is not necessary to read that story before reading this one unless you want to know why Jack is involved, or why Donna is wearing such a ridiculous outfit. But let's face it: this is PWP, so all you really care about is the smut anyway.

::xposted to marriedonmars, andtheropes, and dwfiction, and archived at Teaspoon

( You know what the internet needs? More porn. )

Please go admire iainpj's outstanding work here and here, inspired by something I wrote in a f'locked entry about needing to be well enough to write more porn.

Samples below:

Remember the banjo player from last summer? He's back, has apparently mastered "Something in the Way She Moves," and has moved on to that other classic banjo piece: "The Marseillaise."

I only wish I were kidding.

Despite two straight nights of insomnia, I finally got off my tired, lazy ass to plant the vegetable garden today. All the seedlings are in the ground; the tomatoes are neatly labeled so I know what's what; and everything, including the tree peony, got a nice, long drink of fish fertilizer. (It's stinky, but effective.)

( Two photos, after the cut. )

1. [Insert profane rant about insomnia here]

2. Many of you on my flist will have seen this already, but if you haven't, go read "Mouth to Not-Mouth," by nostalgia_lj, right this instant. It is full of LOLARIOUS TEN/DONNA WRONGNESS, and also kind of my fault. (You should probably be able to guess from the title that this one is not for the kiddies.)

3. Why do I get insomnia on the days when I need to go do something early in the morning? I had been planning to drive out to Russell's to get some bags of their nice bark mulch and the salt hay substitute I use on the vegetable garden, and I know if I'm not there by 10am, the parking lot will be a nightmare, what with Memorial Day being the frost-free date up here. Maybe I'll get "lucky," and this will be the kind of insomnia where I can't get back to sleep at all, and am therefore still functional enough at 8:30 to drive out to Wayland.

4. Must also remember to get cat food, or Inu will eat my face.

5. Reason #5,391 why capitalism sucks: there is no such thing as Bob's 24-Hour Discount Mulch 'n' Pet Food Store for those times when your mulch and pet food emergencies coincide with your insomnia. (Don't preach at me about things like "supply and demand" or "reality" here.)